Updates

So it has been FOREVER since my last post. Hmmm...where do I start? I did apply for that job but didn't get an interview. I applied today for a similar job hoping that the minor changes will show that what a perfect fit it would be. If not...they are promising to let me know by April 30th where I am going to be reporting next year. Yuck! I have been toying with the idea of throwing myself at their feet and requesting a move back to the counseling world. It would be a step back but I think that it might just be what is best for me and for kids. Would give me more time to do what I love and volunteer in my community with kids and families that appreciate help. Not sure yet but it is about time to make the final decision.

Four more days and the Spring Break! I can't wait...five days with no alarm clock and no WORK! I just want to soak up every down time possible.

I went to see Crazy Heart and LOVED LOVED, LOVED it!!!! Run out today and buy tickets if you haven't already seen this movie.

Okay...I am going to count this as number 10 and maybe even 11!!! I took today off from work. I almost never call into work and never on a Monday. Those are our team meetings and it is forbidden to miss. But this morning when my alarm went off I stood up and walked to the phone and called in for the day. No regret, no concern...I just walked back to bed and went to sleep. I spent the day updating my resume, applying for jobs, cleaning my house, working outside in the almost 70 degrees and work out. It was great! And number 11 happened at the gym. I was lifting weight when a woman walked up to me and commented on how strong I was? Excuse me? She repeated it again...you have a strong body and that's amazing. I picked up jaw up off of the ground and simply said thank you. Normally I would try to identify all of my flaws but it felt good to be viewed as strong. So simply put...thank you.

Happy Monday!

Nine!

I got up this morning and dressed in green except for my running shoes (they are pink) and headed out to Run for the Green. I met up with a couple of friends and we joined thousands of people to run/walk a 7k in downtown Denver for a cause. It was a wild bunch of people who were trying to celebrate, set records and stay warm!

I will

Thanks to all of you who offered the support and kick in the butt. You are all right...I have to apply because of the kids. Regardless of the outcome at least I tried and that is the only part that I can control.

A quick update...today my boss announced to my friend and I that he was going to make the announcement to the faculty that we are being moved at the end of the year. Did I mention he was going to make that announcement tomorrow? That is for effect...to try and hurt us in our current position and to break us more than we currently feel. And at this moment I am so grateful for my dad's genetics because the one thing that I refuse to do is break emotionally in front of my boss. So doesn't deserve my emotions. So we shared words and then when I didn't break he lashed out at me personally. He made some ugly statements, threats, etc. And in the end I stood my ground, defended myself and refused to continue.

So tonight I do feel emotionally beat and drained but I will not let him see that...EVER. And while I am sure the "dream" job isn't going to be an option if for no other reason than him I will apply tomorrow. Thanks for the push.

Should I or not...

Today a job posted that I have hoped for since I started working in education. The person who has had the job is a friend of mine and I have said no less than a hundred times that I wished she would retire. And there is some irony that given my current job situation this is the time she has decided to make it final and will exit the role in June.

This morning I got to work and she had left a voice mail telling me to look at the job post and get it filled in quickly. And my response...silence. The truth is that I would love this job, but really don't think that there is a chance that I will even be considered. It's political (as all jobs are for sure) and yet I feel pretty strongly that there is no way that with my professional reputation and current "transfer" out of my school that they would even consider me for such a role. A role that is really written for my passion and interest but that's not really the point.

Yes, I do have a professional reputation that has some truth and some not so much. I am outspoken, blunt, passionate, strong and can be a bit of a bulldog about things that I believe are best for kids. There are parts of me that wish for maybe a softer imagine, but the reality is that I am who I am and am proud of what I believe. I LOVE KIDS! I love the idea that they be supported, cared for, prepared for the real world...I love kids. And this job is a dream job in my mind. So...do I apply knowing that there isn't a chance? Or do I accept reality and hope it will come around another time...or not?

Brand Spakin New

My tax return got here last week and tonight I couldn't wait to buy the one thing that I have wanted for a very long time. My NEW WASHING MACHINE! Who needs a fun car, trip or fancy dinner...I sure do dream big!

Early release

I left work today at 5:30. I can't really remember the last time that I have been in my car driving home at 5:30 but today it was GREAT! I felt like a middle schooler on a half-day schedule because there was no much time this evening to work out, cook dinner, laundry, read and watch a little t.v. A good way to start the week.

I have also been thinking a lot about the L Word. I originally started watching the show during season three or four so was already a little out of the loop. But it didn't take long before I found myself so looking forward to Sunday evenings and catching up the stories every week. But it wasn't until later when I started watching the original seasons one and two that I actually felt the full connection. Every morning I would jump on the treadmill and watch an episode. Not just watch, but I found myself in the stories, questions answered and thoughts confirmed. And now that I haven't watched an episode in soooo long...I miss my friends. I miss the stories and I even miss the craziness. But mostly I miss only the first three seasons because they spoke to me on some level. Not really sure why I'm sharing all of this but glad that I did.