Nov 20, 2008

Know what I want...

I want a family! I mean, I have a family with my parents, brother (even a sister-in-law), niece and everything after that...plus, I have great friends which I consider my family. I have Fred...he is my family. But I would love to add to that family and have my own family. I have been dreaming of babies for weeks. So if there was a doubt, my clock is getting louder.

I use to say that I would never be a single parent, but I know that is not true now. I can be a parent...even a single parent and believe that I have a lot of love to share. Being a single mother by choice means I have to be even more prepared than the average family. So I have read books about how to prepare myself, spoken with my benefits director at work to determine the best way to pay for daycare, identified daycare providers that would work best. My dad bought me a book about getting myself pregnant with a turkey baster (not really my exact plan) and my mom is entertaining the idea of babysitting once a week. As for my friends, everybody is excited about the idea of me getting pregnant or adopting a baby...

I would be lying if I said that there wasn't some fear in messing up the child as a single mother. But then I look around and know that there are great kids who come from all different types of homes. I work with kids every day and know that my desire is not about my need to "have somebody to call my own" but it is about wanting to share new and old experiences with a child. It's about giving love and support, structure and boundaries to a little person who can then grow into a unique individual ready to enter the world. It's about playing in the snow, cheering them during their activities, banging my head with concern of doing the "right" thing...it's about being a parent and loving a child.

A family is what ever you make it to be. Today I share a house with the softest kitty in the world who makes me laugh out loud every single day. And eventually I will add to my family...so am I having a baby today????? No! Just in case you thought I was hiding something big. But I want to have a family and I want to be a parent so one day I hope to share that experience with all of you.

9 comments:

Kelly O said...

You'll make an excellent mom. I'm so happy for you!

If you weren't afraid of effing it up, you wouldn't be taking parenthood seriously enough. We all fear that, constantly. But everything tends to sort itself out. Just jump right in, the water's fine.

karen said...

i think you would be a great mom....and your child would be so blessed to have you as their mom....ihope for twins for you ...double the blessings.....how exciting .....

SP said...

That is so exciting. You will make a wonderful mom.

It' probably weird that my first thought was that I would be willing to help with the turkey baster thing. Yeah, that's weird.

Unknown said...

I really don't know what to say, other than, if you want this...then I say YOU GO GIRL. It sounds like you are taking all of the right steps in obtaining your goal (except purchasing that turkey baster)...

Gwen said...

The hardest part is knowing what you want. Once you've figured that out and told the universe, the rest will happen when it's supposed to happen. You will be a fantastic mom.

PinkPiddyPaws said...

Kitties make the best kids. :)

R said...

I think that this is a fabulous idea! I think you will be a great mom and any kid would be lucky to have you as their parent. SMBC are hard but it's one I believe you and I can both do, we will support each other and make sure our kids don't grow up weird or strange (although isn't everyone?) LOL!! Congrats friend!! I'm happy for you!!

Cat said...

I was raised by a single mom when it was far less common. Family is what you make it!

Unknown said...

I know this is VERY late of a comment, but I had this saved to come back to.... Anyhow, I think it is very exciting about you becoming a mom! I can't wait to hear more about it!