Jul 11, 2007

Does effort count?

I have been writing for the past year about my relationship and my desire to do it better. I use to make a living off of communication and yet I wonder how I could do such a poor job in my personal life. I love my partner and I love her child...I even love her dog. I have been in love with her almost from the beginning of our relationship, but I have always tried to allow her the freedom to determine who she is and what makes her happy. And yet in the end, all I really want to do is be selfish and tell her to stay with me and be happy in the moment. We are trying to figure out the long distance relationship thing and there have been a few bumps along the way. All of that said, and I still want is for her to hold me, tell me she loves me and to have the laughter that only we have. I am desperate to find advice and hope that we can make this transition and that I will still have her with me in the end. I wake up daily worried that I am loosing my grip on us. Part of me says that it may be necessary for her to be happy. But I'm not ready to give up on the love of my life. I hope that she is holding on as tight.

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